it is the end of november. i cannot believe it. am i done with my shopping? barely started. i will get there, but it will be as always, right at the very last minute.
i have been meaning to post this for months. i have wanted to finish my journal that i started several years ago, when L was months old. but it has been patchy at best ever since.
here we go....
D and i met in 1999, and by the fall of that year, moved in together. very happy and then engaged feb 2002. found out we were pregnant in june 2002. married and bought house in oct 2002. on bedrest in late 2002 to feb 2003. L was born feb 2003. in june of 2003, D lost his job. no severence, no health insurance. i was still at home and getting ready to go back to school for nursing. D is in IT/help desk, and wanted to go back to school for nursing as well. his parents offered that if we sold our house and moved from NJ to MA, we could live with them and finish our RNs. well, as hard as i felt that was at the time, being a newlywed and new mom, i thought it was the best decision for us. it tore me apart but i went and tried to put on a brave face. it worked for a time but i struggled. in sept of 2004, i began nursing school in MA. there were many waitlists and since i already had an undergrad, i started and D did some pre-reqs in the meantime. ok, just of note... nursing school is hard as it is, but nursing school with a toddler while living with your in-laws is rough.
*breathe*
in oct of 2005 i was heavy into my 3rd semester. i got pneumonia and whooping cough at the same time just before mid-terms. while on antibiotics, i realized we put ourselves in a situation where we may get pregnant. to my utter shock, D was surprisingly disappointed when i wasn't. we talked and deicded that it would be a good time to try since the baby would be born after i finished school. we tried and i got pregnant after 3 cycles and finished my last semester. at the same time, we did all the paperwork for D to go to RN school in NJ. i graduated with honors in may 2006. my parents bought a multi-family and we decided that moving back to NJ and then living with MY parents while he went to RN school would be the plan... we moved in july 2006, and i passed my NJ RN boards in august 2006. R was born naturally (YAY!!) on my 30th bday in oct 2006.
since all this i have been at home with L and R. D got a job with HP, but it doesn't make it for us every month. i am now working part-time at my old fertility clinic job but am still searching for a perm RN job, and we are anticipating reapplying D to nursing school before jan. (the other school lost his transcripts 3 times, so needlesstosay, we are looking elsewhere..)
think i'm crazy?!??! no, i'm just trying to do what's best. although some days i just don't know, and don't want to screw us up with a bad decision.
sometimes, i don't know what the best decision is.....
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